self-assessment is the first step in identification of our own skills, virtues and flaws. We do tend to underestimate or overestimate ourselves.
First, note that we are unique individuals. We can have similarities, but mix is unique, and we choose the roads we are walking through life and the way we will do the travel under influence of that unique mix. Projection of yourself in future is important is important aspect of successful or unsuccessful travel during that "road". Be aware, when we talk about virtues, we are easy to find them, but flaws, not so much, or vice versa, depending of your personality type.
If we were doing this in person, I would ask you to put a number 1-10 to where you think you are now regarding some aspects of your life, then where you would like to be. Then I would ask you to write 10 of virtues and 10 of flaws, and then connect them - for instance, I am intelligent, strong and persistent. However, my intelligence produces my laziness and selfishness, and my persistent my manipulative nature. Do it for yourself. Then compare them which of your virtues initializes your flow, and what flow initializes your virtue?
For example I am fast in fixing things --> that initiates my hastiness
My stubbornness initializes --->my persistence (club members can testify to this :D :D :D)
Try it yourself. It can be fun.
But what you can see, not all good is good, and not all bad is bad. It means we can evolve, and use even bad things in our advantage, but only when we know, without a doubt, what they are.
The road from here to success (or failure) is not a strength line - it is broken line from now through failures to success. Remember this, it is a fact.
We are playing a lot of roles through our life. Rare are those who are one and the same with everyone (actually, all of people I know that are like that are borderline problematic). We are more or less aware we play those roles. We are mothers (fathers), sons (daughters), lovers, bosses, employees, neighbors, traffic participants, etc. Each of these roles is different and caries many specificity. Try to write five good and bad traits to every role example I have written. Me as a friend. Me as son (daughter). Notice how many are repeating.
There are only four types of personality:
Each type has good and bad sides, and we are usually combination of two types.
I will write them down, and you can find yourself:
- virtues: dynamic, active, determined, persistent, balanced, courageous, confident
- disadvantages: impatient, intolerant, imperious, argumentative, manipulative, workaholic, stubborn
There is a test you can find your type. Usually it is a mix of two. I am, unfortunately to all of you who don't like to read, I am 90% Choleric (of 100%), 23% (of 100)Sanguine, 20 % (of 100) Melancholic and zero Phlegmatic :) This kind of persons are extreme choleric, determined, dynamical and fast, but very stubborn, intolerant and non-symmetrical. They tend to unravel things fast, and it is hard to follow them or understand them. For others they can see reserved or cold, and it can happen that, in need to be effective and operative they disregard needs, time or requests of others. It can be hard for people around them to understand them, and because of that they tend to develop trait that they can rely only on themselves.
Choleric are usually leaders
- virtues: communicative, sociable, humorous, cheerful, curious, honest, inventive
- disadvantages: verbose, pompous, egocentric, forgetful, erratic, naive, variable
Actors, singers, the persons who need to be in center of attention are usually Sanguine
- virtue: analytical, thoughtful, focused, creative, dedicated, conscientious, perfectionist
- disadvantages: sensitive, nonconfident, idealistic, uncertain, stingy, submissive, individualists
people who do analytics, accounting and things with numbers, melancholic tend to do this perfectly
- virtues: relaxed, calm, balanced, patient, consistent, hard-working, professional
- disadvantages: withdrawn, reserved, quiet, slow, sarcastic, timid, unwilling to change
Regarding those four types of personality, there are only three types of combinations:
- Sanguine - Choleric (good leaders)
- Melancholic - Phlegmatic (parents, professors)
- Choleric - Melancholic (entrepreneur)
- Sanguine - Phlegmatic (parent)
opposite: (they happen on life changing moments, when we are not sure what is the right direction or choice)
- Sanguine - Melancholic (mood swings)
- Choleric - Phlegmatic (start then stop with work)
We can do self-assessment on various levels:
We can discuss this more when we meet live on one of our meet-ups, but until then, I would recommend "Self Esteem" book from David Mills, part "overcoming".
Self-assessment is the first thing we talk about when we talk about transversal skills, and it is first step of seven we will talk about, seven that I think are important for a good community leader.
Why is self-awareness important? If you know who you are, you can recognize very fast who others are, and you can plan your moves and actions ahead. Truth be told, I use this mainly to seduce girls and influence business partners, but there are many other instances you can use it for. Personally, I don't care all that much about other situations, and for friends, I don't have to influence, I can just say directly, but, being a good leader of club means also recognizing needs and personality of every member and guiding yourself trough interaction with him.
One of my lieutenants (teamleaders, but we sound badass when we say it like that) is phlegmatic (some of you met him), he is always by my side when we setup, as I tend to explode on stupidity of other people that usually multiple hours of our worktime. He is there to calm me, and, in return, I pull and pull through situations he would not choose to go through, but would like to have benefits of end reach. There are few phlegmatic here on LAN on whom I rely to keep me calm and balanced, who can calm me when I get into fire, and whose judgment and logic I appreciate a lot. You know who you are, guys :D Thank you! :D
Same goes for Sanguine - I send them to do all PR - they love to talk on cameras! Sometimes they tend to say it is not such a joy, but I see their faces when they are in front of cameras :D There are few Sanguine here on LAN also. You know who you are, jokesters :) You make our staying here fun and interesting :) Thank you! :)
And Melancholic - if I have a excel table or some sheet - I know where to turn. Methodical, they are to go when I need something that bores me, but needs to be done perfect. Many of peple on LAN are like that, help with charts, sheets, numbers - it is irreplaceable. Without them, my work would be ten times longer. Thank you!
And of course, when I clash horns or plan something huge together within half of our, that are guys from LAN who are choleric. They tend to spark when we clash with opinions, but when we work together, we move mountains :) Yes, I am watching at you, you know who you are, guys :) From you I also take most experiences. Thank you!
In truth, I hope this will be a start of wonderful journey of sharping transversal skills, which will make your life easier and more pleasant